You were never really there,
And when you came around, all people did was stare,
You chose drugs over us,
At least you loved yourself, that’s a plus.
I try to forget the past, I try to distance myself from your influence,
You going to jail when I needed you most is some coincidence,
It kills me to think you sit there doing nothing,
If I said I forgive you I’d be bluffing.
Nothing feels right, it’s not the same,
When things go wrong it’s you I try to blame,
I wish you were here, I wish I could see you,
Almost everything people say about you is true.
Yet it hurts, the way his words sting,
No one has a clue the pain they bring,
I don’t even have my sisters with me,
I understand though this is how it has to be.
Everyday I think of ways I could have stopped this from happening,
But it all melts down to the fact that I couldn’t have done anything,
Except helped you out, not been so bad,
Thinking it was me that drove you to drugs makes me sad.
Mom, all I can do is say I’m sorry, and I miss you,
We’ll be together one day, and waiting is all we can do.